MENTAL HEALTH-FRIENDLY CHURCH?
It has been said that one in four of the population will, at least at some time in their life, experience mental or emotional health problems. For some, it is a one-off occurrence, for many a recurrent condition, for some a life-long battle. Added to this, we may have among our potential members those with learning difficulties, brain damage or dementia, conditions such as autistic spectrum disorders, or those under the influence of substances which affect their behaviour. It’s not just the outsiders who come in – Christians are not immune, any more than we are immune to diabetes or cancer. Are WE prepared? How do we react?
One of my first lessons in practice came from watching how a church with an established ministry to those with alcohol and drug problems coped with those who came in ‘under the influence.’ A certain amount of disruptive comments occurred, which were taken calmly, and only if the situation was becoming disturbing to other people were they gently taken into another room. At this time, and at the midweek activities, they were treated with love and compassion, as well as discipline and guidance – not ‘either/or’ but ‘both/and.’
We may see this as the ‘obvious’ face of mental health problems – but how many more of our congregation are suffering invisible wounds or hidden illnesses. It has been written that if those with clinical depression or anxiety came out in purple spots, they would receive a lot more help. Add to this those suffering from eating disorders, bereavement, lesser degrees of sadness, worry, work, family or financial problems – we have a church in desperate need of support – but a church where many of us have the resources to help each other because we have ‘been there.’ God’s call is often to those “like us.”
An even earlier experience was when an adult came to church with a plaster and said “I cut myself.” “Nothing unusual,” I thought. “How?” “With scissors.” (Strange – scissors on the forearm?) Little did I know at that, forty years later, I would know what she meant – and how many Christians of all ages use self-harm in various form as a coping mechanism. How would we react? Would we be less shocked if the person said they had “Drowned their sorrows in drink?” Probably yes. But for many of us the reasoning, the short-term effects and the long-term results are very similar.
Someone comes to you and says “I’m struggling!” “Oh” is the reply. Or do we say “Do you want to tell me a bit about it?” They may feel now is not the time, but we give them the opportunity to share more, and we let them know that we care. We may say “I’ll pray for you tonight” – then make sure we do. Sometimes we may feel led to say “Would you like me to pray with you now” and, led by the Holy Spirit, it can be beautiful.
It may get even more frightening if a Christian expresses their desire to ‘hasten their being with Jesus’ and take their own life. Whatever our belief about its sinfulness, we must remember that it is often a symptom of an illness, not an act of the will. The person is probably already condemning themselves for having these feelings. If we say “A Christian shouldn’t have such thoughts!” we make them feel totally rejected, and much, much worse. I was on the receipt of this on one occasion. Some time later this person tried to touch me in a way that wasn’t appropriate. I took steps to ensure that this could not happen again, but later explained that we all have different areas in which we are tempted. For me, I really have little concept of sexual temptation, for him he had no concept of depressive temptations. We are all human. We are all tempted, but we all have the one source of victory to overcome our temptations through Christ. Even more traumatic for the recipient can be putting it all down to “demons” or “demon possession”. True, this may extremely rarely be the case in those who have been involved with the occult, but many may feel this way because of their illness and thoughts they cannot understand. On one occasion someone tried to ‘deliver me’ from depression. I knew I should not have gone to the meeting as I was utterly exhausted from work – it was the exhaustion, not “a demon” that was affecting me.
We must be careful not to make this a trite answer – “Come to Christ and all your problems will be solved.” I refuse to sing the line of a song which says “And in His presence our problems disappear” – the dementia and physical problems of the husband of one of our worship group; the hunger of Christians in Africa; the persecution of many for their faith? No – our problems don’t disappear but we find that Christ is with us in them, and that is where we find the strength to get through.
One of my favourite songs begins “When my heart was so broken that I could not pray – somebody prayed for me.” Sometimes we just cannot pray for ourselves – yet how grateful we are to those who act like Aaron and Hur with Moses and support us, or take us to Jesus. Prayer often needs to be ongoing – not just ‘one-off.’ Instantaneous healings may occur – or, as in my case, instantaneous remissions, but we need ongoing prayer, acceptance and support to grow in wholeness.
The Paralympics teach us much about disability. We are ALL disabled in some way, but that does not mean we are useless. Perhaps the expression ‘differently-abled’ may seem too ‘PC’ for us – but all of us have abilities to love, to care, perhaps to pray, perhaps to share – often to those who are where we have been. Perhaps some of the most uplifting times in my darkness have been when I’ve needed to walk with another in similar circumstances and God encourages me to comfort them. None of us is worthless, each of us is of value. In the old Sunday School hymn “There’s a work for Jesus none but you can do.” There’s a lesson for us, too, in the weakest. As a teenager with very severe learning difficulties sat next to me rubbing a balloon up and down my arm while I, a balloon-phobic, was trying to give a talk, I realised she was trying to express her love. Someone ‘differently-abled’ shows me that life can be loved, even with limitations. We give – we receive. We teach – we learn. We grow – together.
WELCOME
Perhaps one of the commonest feeling of those with emotional or mental problems is that of loneliness - or of feeling ‘different’ – not accepted. Perhaps some grew up with those hidden conditions undiagnosed as children, but now more widely recognised – dyslexia, dyspraxia (Don’t want you on my team – you can’t catch, you can’t run, you can’t even ride a bike!), social deficits, physical deformities – even teasing like ‘four-eyes!’ It goes with us. We want to be accepted – yet we may not know how to react, and people feel pushed away. We think we are logical yet are condemned for verbal aggression as we try to explain a detailed plan to someone who cannot see the big picture (while we cannot see the wood for the trees! – just put an extreme Myers-Briggs ISTJ database manager with and equally extreme ENFP fundraiser and it is like an English/Japanese conversation with neither speaking the others language!) We may need someone to help – and we may need someone to mediate in our fellowship, too.
Sometimes people are given an effusive welcome, when they hope to slip quietly into a back seat – yet a smile can be worth a thousand words. Yet nobody wants to be truly invisible – a non-person. Not everyone wants a hug. Some have been hurt by inappropriate touching; others have extremely sensitive perceptions which can interpret touch as pain. Touch may bring out emotion. Are we prepared? The strategically placed boxes of tissues? Perhaps, if someone is weeping, we may feel it right to take a box and perhaps say “Would you like me to hug you?” (If of the same gender.) Later we may invite a visitor to after-service coffee and talk about non-threatening things, allowing them to share anything they want to – but letting them know we care. Only once they know we care can they know that God cares.
WHAT WE SAY
I love the description of the word ‘assume’ = ‘to make an ASS out of U and ME!’ How easily we assume things – perhaps things about other cultures, other denominations. I had a tremendous ‘unlearning curve’ when I first met Roman Catholics and Pentecostals – ‘assuming’ they believed as I had been taught they did – until I met them. When many of us were young, Christian teaching in schools was the norm – we grew up knowing the truths about Christmas, the Crucifixion and Resurrection, and so much more. Now we are finding children who have no idea. ‘Those who have never heard of Jesus’ used to be in the ‘distant lands’ we heard of in missionary appeals. Now they are much closer to home. Do we assume they know our stories – and what to them is our ‘church jargon.’ Perhaps we assume things about those who have committed certain sins (and I wonder why sexual sins are singled out as ‘more sinful’ than tax evasion etc.?) – a minister who has ‘fallen from grace’, or about those who have problems. Perhaps we assume these things about ourselves, in self-condemnation. Perhaps we have had a relapse after believing that we have been permanently healed. This song, by a wonderful author, who has recently been called home to be with the Lord, says so much:
Don’t assume that God's dismissed you from his mind,
Don't assume that God's forgotten to be kind;
For no matter what you do, his love still follows you;
Don't think that you have left him far behind.
For his love remains the same,
He knows you by your name,
Don't think because you failed him he despairs;
For he gives to those who ask
His grace for every task,
God plans for you in love for he still cares.
Don't assume that God will plan for you no more,
Don't assume that there's no future to explore;
For your life he'll re-design, the pattern be divine;
Don't think that your repentance he'll ignore.
For his love remains the same,
He knows you by your name,
Don't think because you failed him he despairs;
For he gives to those who ask
His grace for every task,
God plans for you in love for he still cares.
Don't assume you cannot give what he'll demand,
Don't assume that God condemns you out of hand;
For he gives to those who ask his grace for every task;
Don't think that God will fail to understand.
Don't think that your repentance he'll ignore.
For his love remains the same,
He knows you by your name,
Don't think because you failed him he despairs;
For he gives to those who ask
His grace for every task,
God plans for you in love for he still cares.
John Gowans
CONFIDENTIALITY AND ACCOUNTABILITY
These two things go hand in hand, and are extremely important. We cannot promise that we will never tell anyone else what is said. First of all, if we believe that the person themselves, or another person is in serious danger of harm, we must tell someone. Secondly, almost all of us are not medically qualified – and even if we are, we are extremely unlikely to be that person’s doctor, counsellor or psychiatrist. If the person is under medical care or therapy, this is the responsibility of those treating them. Our task is to help them understand each other, and to give support and prayer – and let the person know we are doing so, but not to usurp other peoples’ responsibilities. One of the saddest things I remember, years ago, was of a person with schizophrenia – well-controlled by medication, who was told that, as she had been healed, she had no need of further drugs! A few months later she had a severe relapse. Fortunately, she responded well to treatment, but it could easily have been very different. Indeed, as with cases of people with diabetes being told to stop their insulin, there could be legal implications, and it brings the church, and God’s healing power, into disrepute.
Another thing when supporting someone is to set boundaries. “You can phone me at any time” may occasionally be appropriate in a crisis, but can easily grow to repeated calls at midnight, and eventually to burnout of the helper. Much as there is a truth in the prayer “Let me burn out for Thee” – as opposed to being a cold “clod” doing nothing, God does not intend His children to suffer from burnout, and it does not further His kingdom. Perhaps a way round this is to give people a list of prayer lines and secular helplines – several of which are open for 24 hours, which they can call for support, day or night – usually by people who have been trained in handling such calls. If we have our lists we can pass them on without a hasty tral through the Internet!
Nobody should act alone in the Christian church. We are a body. We all need to be accountable to someone. The success of many 12-step programmes, such as Alcoholics Anonymous depends very much on accountability. There are practical things in my life for which I need to be held accountable by friends. My resolution may wane – so I need them to hold me to it. We can’t expect our church leaders to supervise our every move – and in my case these people are a prayer partner and my friend who come into my (untidy) home and can remind me if it gets untidier still! However, we are accountable to our church leaders, or to those delegated by them – cell group leaders, home group leaders, pastoral assistants and teams, discipleship co-ordinators etc. The leaders must know what is going on in their church. The excesses of a group some years ago came from a ‘split-off’ service, which slowly moved into unwise practices without the guidance of their leader.
Why do we need accountability? As I said above, the leaders carry the responsibility for the church both to those over them and, ultimately, to God, so must be fully aware. Those to whom we are accountable may see subtle signs of impending burnout or breaches of boundaries, and alert us. Caring responsibilities can put us in the way of certain temptations, and may be the reason why what starts as an innocent ‘helping’ activity with a church worker can almost imperceptibly slide into an ‘affair.’ While usually male and female, it can involve a first homosexual relationship, as I saw in the case of two former friends. Any helping relationship needs to be ‘covered’ by a wise and experienced person with authority over us. Rarely, especially in the case of those with substance abuse issues or anger management problems, there may be the risk of violence. Above all, we need to be covered in prayer. We have an enemy who would like to use another’s problems to turn us aside in one way or another. We need to ‘watch and pray’ – but we need someone to watch with us.
Above all, we cannot to it in our own strength, and I am learning daily the meaning of the words of Albert Orsborn:
In the secret of Thy presence
Where the pure in heart may dwell
Are the springs of sacred service
And a power that none can tell.
There my love must bring its offering;
There my heart must yield its praise
And my Lord will come, revealing
All the secrets of His ways
In the secret of Thy presence;
In the hiding of Thy power
Let me love Thee, let me serve Thee
Every consecrated hour.
More than all my lips may utter;
More than all I do or bring
Is the depth of my devotion
To my Saviour, Lord and King.
Nothing less can keep me holy,
Nothing less can keep me true;
Nothing less can keep the fragrance
And the bloom on all I do.
Blessed Lord, to see Thee truly,
Then to tell as I have seen,
This shall rule my life supremely,
This shall be the sacred gleam.
Sealed again is all the sealing,
Pledged again my willing heart
First to know Thee, then to serve Thee
Then to see Thee as Thou art.
Albert Orsborn
MEDITATIONS ON “IN THE SECRET OF THY PRESENCE”
“The springs of sacred service” –
I never really
Used to understand this, Lord.
You called me –
Yes, You equipped me –
“In theory.”
But I was so often
“Running on empty.”
I tried to serve You
In my strength,
As my duty;
As my obedient service.
But it is
“In the secret of Thy presence,
In the hiding of Thy power”
That the springs are found;
YOUR power for service,
Not MY power to serve You,
Leading to exhaustion
And barrenness.
I want to be in Your presence –
Still –
Like a sponge
Soaking up
Your likeness;
Your strength;
Yourself.
If I give out from my strength
It is ME that is seen.
If it is out of Your infilling,
It is YOU that will be
Squeezed out to others
Like water from a sponge –
Life-giving;
Refreshing;
Empowering.
But I must be
“Pure in heart” –
Daily cleansed by You;
Daily reliant on You;
Daily renewed in You.
For only then
Can I give
YOU.
Ann S Clifton © 2006
~~~~~
It has been said that one in four of the population will, at least at some time in their life, experience mental or emotional health problems. For some, it is a one-off occurrence, for many a recurrent condition, for some a life-long battle. Added to this, we may have among our potential members those with learning difficulties, brain damage or dementia, conditions such as autistic spectrum disorders, or those under the influence of substances which affect their behaviour. It’s not just the outsiders who come in – Christians are not immune, any more than we are immune to diabetes or cancer. Are WE prepared? How do we react?
One of my first lessons in practice came from watching how a church with an established ministry to those with alcohol and drug problems coped with those who came in ‘under the influence.’ A certain amount of disruptive comments occurred, which were taken calmly, and only if the situation was becoming disturbing to other people were they gently taken into another room. At this time, and at the midweek activities, they were treated with love and compassion, as well as discipline and guidance – not ‘either/or’ but ‘both/and.’
We may see this as the ‘obvious’ face of mental health problems – but how many more of our congregation are suffering invisible wounds or hidden illnesses. It has been written that if those with clinical depression or anxiety came out in purple spots, they would receive a lot more help. Add to this those suffering from eating disorders, bereavement, lesser degrees of sadness, worry, work, family or financial problems – we have a church in desperate need of support – but a church where many of us have the resources to help each other because we have ‘been there.’ God’s call is often to those “like us.”
An even earlier experience was when an adult came to church with a plaster and said “I cut myself.” “Nothing unusual,” I thought. “How?” “With scissors.” (Strange – scissors on the forearm?) Little did I know at that, forty years later, I would know what she meant – and how many Christians of all ages use self-harm in various form as a coping mechanism. How would we react? Would we be less shocked if the person said they had “Drowned their sorrows in drink?” Probably yes. But for many of us the reasoning, the short-term effects and the long-term results are very similar.
Someone comes to you and says “I’m struggling!” “Oh” is the reply. Or do we say “Do you want to tell me a bit about it?” They may feel now is not the time, but we give them the opportunity to share more, and we let them know that we care. We may say “I’ll pray for you tonight” – then make sure we do. Sometimes we may feel led to say “Would you like me to pray with you now” and, led by the Holy Spirit, it can be beautiful.
It may get even more frightening if a Christian expresses their desire to ‘hasten their being with Jesus’ and take their own life. Whatever our belief about its sinfulness, we must remember that it is often a symptom of an illness, not an act of the will. The person is probably already condemning themselves for having these feelings. If we say “A Christian shouldn’t have such thoughts!” we make them feel totally rejected, and much, much worse. I was on the receipt of this on one occasion. Some time later this person tried to touch me in a way that wasn’t appropriate. I took steps to ensure that this could not happen again, but later explained that we all have different areas in which we are tempted. For me, I really have little concept of sexual temptation, for him he had no concept of depressive temptations. We are all human. We are all tempted, but we all have the one source of victory to overcome our temptations through Christ. Even more traumatic for the recipient can be putting it all down to “demons” or “demon possession”. True, this may extremely rarely be the case in those who have been involved with the occult, but many may feel this way because of their illness and thoughts they cannot understand. On one occasion someone tried to ‘deliver me’ from depression. I knew I should not have gone to the meeting as I was utterly exhausted from work – it was the exhaustion, not “a demon” that was affecting me.
We must be careful not to make this a trite answer – “Come to Christ and all your problems will be solved.” I refuse to sing the line of a song which says “And in His presence our problems disappear” – the dementia and physical problems of the husband of one of our worship group; the hunger of Christians in Africa; the persecution of many for their faith? No – our problems don’t disappear but we find that Christ is with us in them, and that is where we find the strength to get through.
One of my favourite songs begins “When my heart was so broken that I could not pray – somebody prayed for me.” Sometimes we just cannot pray for ourselves – yet how grateful we are to those who act like Aaron and Hur with Moses and support us, or take us to Jesus. Prayer often needs to be ongoing – not just ‘one-off.’ Instantaneous healings may occur – or, as in my case, instantaneous remissions, but we need ongoing prayer, acceptance and support to grow in wholeness.
The Paralympics teach us much about disability. We are ALL disabled in some way, but that does not mean we are useless. Perhaps the expression ‘differently-abled’ may seem too ‘PC’ for us – but all of us have abilities to love, to care, perhaps to pray, perhaps to share – often to those who are where we have been. Perhaps some of the most uplifting times in my darkness have been when I’ve needed to walk with another in similar circumstances and God encourages me to comfort them. None of us is worthless, each of us is of value. In the old Sunday School hymn “There’s a work for Jesus none but you can do.” There’s a lesson for us, too, in the weakest. As a teenager with very severe learning difficulties sat next to me rubbing a balloon up and down my arm while I, a balloon-phobic, was trying to give a talk, I realised she was trying to express her love. Someone ‘differently-abled’ shows me that life can be loved, even with limitations. We give – we receive. We teach – we learn. We grow – together.
WELCOME
Perhaps one of the commonest feeling of those with emotional or mental problems is that of loneliness - or of feeling ‘different’ – not accepted. Perhaps some grew up with those hidden conditions undiagnosed as children, but now more widely recognised – dyslexia, dyspraxia (Don’t want you on my team – you can’t catch, you can’t run, you can’t even ride a bike!), social deficits, physical deformities – even teasing like ‘four-eyes!’ It goes with us. We want to be accepted – yet we may not know how to react, and people feel pushed away. We think we are logical yet are condemned for verbal aggression as we try to explain a detailed plan to someone who cannot see the big picture (while we cannot see the wood for the trees! – just put an extreme Myers-Briggs ISTJ database manager with and equally extreme ENFP fundraiser and it is like an English/Japanese conversation with neither speaking the others language!) We may need someone to help – and we may need someone to mediate in our fellowship, too.
Sometimes people are given an effusive welcome, when they hope to slip quietly into a back seat – yet a smile can be worth a thousand words. Yet nobody wants to be truly invisible – a non-person. Not everyone wants a hug. Some have been hurt by inappropriate touching; others have extremely sensitive perceptions which can interpret touch as pain. Touch may bring out emotion. Are we prepared? The strategically placed boxes of tissues? Perhaps, if someone is weeping, we may feel it right to take a box and perhaps say “Would you like me to hug you?” (If of the same gender.) Later we may invite a visitor to after-service coffee and talk about non-threatening things, allowing them to share anything they want to – but letting them know we care. Only once they know we care can they know that God cares.
WHAT WE SAY
I love the description of the word ‘assume’ = ‘to make an ASS out of U and ME!’ How easily we assume things – perhaps things about other cultures, other denominations. I had a tremendous ‘unlearning curve’ when I first met Roman Catholics and Pentecostals – ‘assuming’ they believed as I had been taught they did – until I met them. When many of us were young, Christian teaching in schools was the norm – we grew up knowing the truths about Christmas, the Crucifixion and Resurrection, and so much more. Now we are finding children who have no idea. ‘Those who have never heard of Jesus’ used to be in the ‘distant lands’ we heard of in missionary appeals. Now they are much closer to home. Do we assume they know our stories – and what to them is our ‘church jargon.’ Perhaps we assume things about those who have committed certain sins (and I wonder why sexual sins are singled out as ‘more sinful’ than tax evasion etc.?) – a minister who has ‘fallen from grace’, or about those who have problems. Perhaps we assume these things about ourselves, in self-condemnation. Perhaps we have had a relapse after believing that we have been permanently healed. This song, by a wonderful author, who has recently been called home to be with the Lord, says so much:
Don’t assume that God's dismissed you from his mind,
Don't assume that God's forgotten to be kind;
For no matter what you do, his love still follows you;
Don't think that you have left him far behind.
For his love remains the same,
He knows you by your name,
Don't think because you failed him he despairs;
For he gives to those who ask
His grace for every task,
God plans for you in love for he still cares.
Don't assume that God will plan for you no more,
Don't assume that there's no future to explore;
For your life he'll re-design, the pattern be divine;
Don't think that your repentance he'll ignore.
For his love remains the same,
He knows you by your name,
Don't think because you failed him he despairs;
For he gives to those who ask
His grace for every task,
God plans for you in love for he still cares.
Don't assume you cannot give what he'll demand,
Don't assume that God condemns you out of hand;
For he gives to those who ask his grace for every task;
Don't think that God will fail to understand.
Don't think that your repentance he'll ignore.
For his love remains the same,
He knows you by your name,
Don't think because you failed him he despairs;
For he gives to those who ask
His grace for every task,
God plans for you in love for he still cares.
John Gowans
CONFIDENTIALITY AND ACCOUNTABILITY
These two things go hand in hand, and are extremely important. We cannot promise that we will never tell anyone else what is said. First of all, if we believe that the person themselves, or another person is in serious danger of harm, we must tell someone. Secondly, almost all of us are not medically qualified – and even if we are, we are extremely unlikely to be that person’s doctor, counsellor or psychiatrist. If the person is under medical care or therapy, this is the responsibility of those treating them. Our task is to help them understand each other, and to give support and prayer – and let the person know we are doing so, but not to usurp other peoples’ responsibilities. One of the saddest things I remember, years ago, was of a person with schizophrenia – well-controlled by medication, who was told that, as she had been healed, she had no need of further drugs! A few months later she had a severe relapse. Fortunately, she responded well to treatment, but it could easily have been very different. Indeed, as with cases of people with diabetes being told to stop their insulin, there could be legal implications, and it brings the church, and God’s healing power, into disrepute.
Another thing when supporting someone is to set boundaries. “You can phone me at any time” may occasionally be appropriate in a crisis, but can easily grow to repeated calls at midnight, and eventually to burnout of the helper. Much as there is a truth in the prayer “Let me burn out for Thee” – as opposed to being a cold “clod” doing nothing, God does not intend His children to suffer from burnout, and it does not further His kingdom. Perhaps a way round this is to give people a list of prayer lines and secular helplines – several of which are open for 24 hours, which they can call for support, day or night – usually by people who have been trained in handling such calls. If we have our lists we can pass them on without a hasty tral through the Internet!
Nobody should act alone in the Christian church. We are a body. We all need to be accountable to someone. The success of many 12-step programmes, such as Alcoholics Anonymous depends very much on accountability. There are practical things in my life for which I need to be held accountable by friends. My resolution may wane – so I need them to hold me to it. We can’t expect our church leaders to supervise our every move – and in my case these people are a prayer partner and my friend who come into my (untidy) home and can remind me if it gets untidier still! However, we are accountable to our church leaders, or to those delegated by them – cell group leaders, home group leaders, pastoral assistants and teams, discipleship co-ordinators etc. The leaders must know what is going on in their church. The excesses of a group some years ago came from a ‘split-off’ service, which slowly moved into unwise practices without the guidance of their leader.
Why do we need accountability? As I said above, the leaders carry the responsibility for the church both to those over them and, ultimately, to God, so must be fully aware. Those to whom we are accountable may see subtle signs of impending burnout or breaches of boundaries, and alert us. Caring responsibilities can put us in the way of certain temptations, and may be the reason why what starts as an innocent ‘helping’ activity with a church worker can almost imperceptibly slide into an ‘affair.’ While usually male and female, it can involve a first homosexual relationship, as I saw in the case of two former friends. Any helping relationship needs to be ‘covered’ by a wise and experienced person with authority over us. Rarely, especially in the case of those with substance abuse issues or anger management problems, there may be the risk of violence. Above all, we need to be covered in prayer. We have an enemy who would like to use another’s problems to turn us aside in one way or another. We need to ‘watch and pray’ – but we need someone to watch with us.
Above all, we cannot to it in our own strength, and I am learning daily the meaning of the words of Albert Orsborn:
In the secret of Thy presence
Where the pure in heart may dwell
Are the springs of sacred service
And a power that none can tell.
There my love must bring its offering;
There my heart must yield its praise
And my Lord will come, revealing
All the secrets of His ways
In the secret of Thy presence;
In the hiding of Thy power
Let me love Thee, let me serve Thee
Every consecrated hour.
More than all my lips may utter;
More than all I do or bring
Is the depth of my devotion
To my Saviour, Lord and King.
Nothing less can keep me holy,
Nothing less can keep me true;
Nothing less can keep the fragrance
And the bloom on all I do.
Blessed Lord, to see Thee truly,
Then to tell as I have seen,
This shall rule my life supremely,
This shall be the sacred gleam.
Sealed again is all the sealing,
Pledged again my willing heart
First to know Thee, then to serve Thee
Then to see Thee as Thou art.
Albert Orsborn
MEDITATIONS ON “IN THE SECRET OF THY PRESENCE”
“The springs of sacred service” –
I never really
Used to understand this, Lord.
You called me –
Yes, You equipped me –
“In theory.”
But I was so often
“Running on empty.”
I tried to serve You
In my strength,
As my duty;
As my obedient service.
But it is
“In the secret of Thy presence,
In the hiding of Thy power”
That the springs are found;
YOUR power for service,
Not MY power to serve You,
Leading to exhaustion
And barrenness.
I want to be in Your presence –
Still –
Like a sponge
Soaking up
Your likeness;
Your strength;
Yourself.
If I give out from my strength
It is ME that is seen.
If it is out of Your infilling,
It is YOU that will be
Squeezed out to others
Like water from a sponge –
Life-giving;
Refreshing;
Empowering.
But I must be
“Pure in heart” –
Daily cleansed by You;
Daily reliant on You;
Daily renewed in You.
For only then
Can I give
YOU.
Ann S Clifton © 2006
~~~~~